They remain vigilant…hidden in the cool dark depths…secretly laughing at your infantile tricks. Water-born warriors whose resolve has been crafted by a lifetime of being hunted by predators. As you stand ready for battle you can see dozens of glistening unblinking eyes watching you from just beneath the rippling surface. They are always ready. The question is…Are you? Come join 2-Tuff Tony as he hosts this fishy contest that may take you to the brink of lunacy and beyond! Prizes will be determined by the combined weight of each competitor’s three biggest fish caught: First Place—GOTJ Gold Plaque and $100 gift certificate; Second Place—$100 gift certificate; and Third Place—$50 gift certificate. Those wishing to compete should bring all their own fishing gear, bait, and a bucket (limit of two fishing poles per competitor). Only those fish caught during the contest (and witnessed by a judge) will be counted. Those wishing to compete should show up at the Seminar Tent between 7:30 a.m. and 8 a.m. (don’t be late).
Juggalos are some of the most creative ninjas on the planet and nowhere is this more apparent than at this bizarre competition. It’s as if the world of dreams had spilled over into ours causing the reality we know to suddenly go sideways. Here you will find many-eyed beholders, giant yellow ninjas, breakdancing grim reapers, lifelike Joker’s cards, magical gypsy kings, and whatever else you could possibly imagine. It’s a place where your wildest fantasies come to play and your worst nightmares come to stay. Prizes: First Place—GOTJ Gold Plaque and $100 gift certificate; Second Place—$100 gift certificate; and Third Place—$50 gift certificate. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins with a costume. A private dressing area will be provided.
Dark Carnival Games Event
For some, gaming is fun…for others, it’s a way of life. Come join your DCG homies as they host 2 separate gaming tournaments running under the same roof. Dice will roll, tears will fall, cheers will be heard, PCs will be decapitated…What more could you ask for?
Morton’s List: Chaos Crow Tournament
This adventure hosted by Nathan Prime and the Ninjas of Smoke Crew engages Inner Circles who under the crow’s shadow try to complete chaotically fused Quests that are sure to cause mayhem wherever they lead. Prizes: Members of the winning Inner Circle will each be given a Chaos Crow metal charm and a signed copy of Morton’s List. Those wishing to play should show up at least 15 minutes before the tournament begins, and players do not need to know how to play to compete.
Quest for Shangri-La Board Game Tournament
Hosted by Jumpsteady is this tournament for the undisputed world champion of Quest for Shangri-La! Players will need to be cunning, intelligent, lucky, and above all ruthless if they plan to win! Prize: First Place—Quest for Shangri-La Plaque and a signed copy of Into the Echoside. Those wishing to play should show up at least 15 minutes before the tournament begins (24 players max), and players do not need to know how to play to compete.
Faygo Launching Contest
This is a skill that Juggalos have been perfecting since the first Faygo bottle was rocketed from an ICP stage on a carbonated trail of bubbly pleasure. For this contest of explosive fun, competitors have 2 attempts to launch a Faygo bottle from the stage as far as they can using any technique they wish (triple tap stage bounce, middle finger rocket launch, suppository release, Hail Mary throw, etc.). Whoever achieves the furthest distance gets to sit on the throne of the Faygo King, and whoever is still sitting there at the end of the contest wins! Prize: Furthest distance—$200 gift certificate. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins (100 competitors max).
Flow Master Rap Battle
In America there is a race car driver…go to the track and whisper his name. Say Mario Andretti and watch all the heads nod up and down. Or go to a boxing ring in China and mention the name Zou Shiming and witness the glow of admiration in everyone’s eyes. Both men risked death daily and both are legends: for you never make the great at anything by playin’ it safe. So you should take the chance to become a legend at this competition by putting wit, confidence, and verbal mastery to the test. Each performer will first freestyle for 60 seconds (to a provided beat). The judges will then determine who will move on to the final round. The final round will then consist of an elimination-style battle where rappers will compete directly against each other until there is only one. Final Round Prizes: First Place—GOTJ Gold Plaque and $300 in cash; Second Place—$100 gift certificate; and Third Place—$50 gift certificate. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins.
Juggalo Family Feud
Once again it’s time to play the Juggalo Family Feud! Back by popular demand is this amusing, slightly demented, and sometimes X-rated game show where you could win big prizes! Just assemble your crew of 4 to 5 players and head on down to compete with a rival crew as you try to give the top answers to questions surveyed to a 100 Juggalos. The first crew to reach 300 points wins the game and earns the right to compete in the Fast Money Round! So come on down to play or merely watch the hilarity of this amazing show as it unfolds! Prizes: Members of the winning crew will receive a collectable Into the Echoside (Hatchetman skull logo) Zippo lighter. If the winning crew also wins the Fast Money round, they will receive a $200 gift certificate. Crews of 4 to 5 wishing to compete can show up at any time (multiple games will run each night) on a first come, first serve basis.
Juggalo Gong Show
This chaotic game show hosted by the flamboyant Chuck Bareass is one of the Gathering’s best kept secrets. Anyone can compete by taking the stage to display whatever talent they possess; be it pogo stick tricks, projecting flame farts, singing acapella, playing butt bongos, or a jiu jitsu demonstration (but please no rapping). You can perform for up to 2 minutes alone or with a group of friends. Don’t come correct and you may get gonged, but last till the end and the judges will rate your performance, with the top three scores winning! All the while there will be lap dancing man babies, sword wielding small people, glitter showers, scantily clad exotic dancers, and giant inflatable puppets. So don’t miss this show that is sure to please, tease, and cause you to bounce like double Ds! Prizes: First Place—GOTJ Gold Plaque, used granny panties, and an old leotard full of $78.12; Second Place—$80 gift certificate, a lap dance from a Gong Show dancer of your choice, and a He-Man action figure ; and Third Place – Mystery gift. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins. Music will be provided if needed (feel free to bring your own).
Juggalo Psypher Auditions
This is huge! For the second year in a row we bring to you your chance to be in a Psychopathic Records filmed and produced Juggalo Psypher music video! The first step is to show up for auditions on Thursday (3 p.m.–6 p.m.) where you will get to rap or sing 16–20 bars in front of a panel of judges (a beat will be provided). Each performer will then be scored on flow, lyrical content, and stage presence. The names of the top 6 scored will then be posted at the Info Tent at 7 p.m. (if you win, make sure to inform a ninja at the Info Tent). Those chosen will then return at 1 a.m. to perform in a professionally filmed music video at the DJ Party in the Fun House. This video will then eventually be posted on all Psychopathic’s social media sites, webpages, and YouTube channel! This is arguably one of the dopest contests at the Gathering this year! Stop playin’!
2015 GOTJ Video Pyspher
Killer Clown Academy
Ever wonder what it would be like to be one of the killer clowns on stage during an ICP live performance? Well here is your chance to find out first hand! The Killer Clown Academy is a grueling but short school that simulates the real conditions that these performers go through. There are four challenges in all during this elimination style process with the top 3 students earning the right for a once in a lifetime opportunity to perform on the Big Top stage during ICP’s GOTJ 17 show! Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins.
Dance of the Wicked – All students will take the stage at the same time to get as live as humanly possible. All the while they will be blasted with super soakers, confetti cannons, water balloons and empty Faygo bottles. Judges will give out 20 golden tickets to those that schooled it the hardest, who will then get to move on to the next round.
Faygo Flair – Students will be scored by judges by how creatively they can launch, spray or empty a 2-liter of Faygo. Panache, showmanship and style are all that matters; distance is not important. Those in clown suits will get an extra 2-liter and will get to use the better of the two scores. The students with the top 12 scores will get to move on to the next round.
Faygo Relay – Students are timed by how quickly they can move 20 2-liters of Faygo from one container to another using any method they choose (but no tools). The students with the best 6 times will move on to the next round.
Super Soaker Marksmanship – Students will attempt to be the fastest at knocking down 6 empty Faygo bottles set at various distances using only a super soaker filled with Faygo. The students with the best 3 times will graduate from the Killer Clown Academy and be able to perform on stage with ICP as a Killer Clown! Dope…dope…DOPE!!!
Into the Echoside Tournament
Do You Dare Delve Into the Deepest Levels of the Nethervoid? “Into the Echoside” is a brand new card game released at GOTJ 17 that takes place in deepest levels of the Nethervoid, which is a cold plane of infinite evil populated by demonic hoards. This elimination-style tournament is hosted by Jumpsteady and other mentors who will help you on your quest to gain enough strength to vanquish this unimaginable evil! Prize: First Place—Into the Echoside Plaque and a signed copy of Into the Echoside. Second Place—Signed copy of Into the Echoside. Those wishing to play should show up at least 15 minutes before the tournament begins (36 players max). Players do not need to know how to play to compete.
This late-night fantasy-come-to-life contest is sure to titillate the excited crowd. You won’t believe your perverted peepers as fine Juggalette vixens adorned in their sexist attire pay homage to the beauty of the female form. So get ready to pump, pump, pump it up (but not literally) as you witness this amazing spectacle of skin, lace, and curves that will ensure that everyone in the crowd will leave a winner! Prizes: First Place—$300 in cash; Second Place—$100 gift certificate; and Third Place—$50 gift certificate. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins with lingerie or other sexy attire. A private dressing room will be provided.
Miss Juggalette Pageant
Juggalettes are by far the most attractive women on the planet. Their beauty is exemplified through their intellect, charm, creativity, spirit, and physical form. They are the mothers of the Earth and nurturers of life who can avert war with but a smile. They are to be treasured, respected, and honored above all because it’s their love that moves the universe. This pageant pays homage to all of our treasured Juggalettes and for many is the most monumental event at the Gathering. It consists of three rounds: #1: Personality—Q&A. #2: Talent—Contestants show off a skill (dancing, rapping, juggling, etc.). And #3: Swimsuit competition! Judges will tally the scores from all rounds (taking crowd reaction into heavy consideration) to determine who will become this year’s Juggalette Queen! Prizes: First Place—GOTJ Gold Plaque, $300 in cash, and a backstage pass; Second Place—$100 gift certificate; and Third Place—$50 gift certificate. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins and bring their own swimsuit (or comparable attire) with them. A private dressing area will be provided as well as any music needed for the talent round.
Shadow warriors gather each year for this sacred martial contest to determine whom amongst them will be bestowed the title of grand master of all ninjas! To survive one must possess equal parts strength, cunning, quickness, and prowess. The last assassin left standing will then be able to trod upon the shattered corpses of their fallen foes to claim their prize! In each of the five rounds, ninjas will have to battle one opponent to see if they can advance to the next. Round #1: Foam Long Swords. Round #2: Foam Short Swords. Round #3: Sumo Wrestling. Round #4: Martial Arts (light contact to the torso only, with protective gear). Round #5: Three vs. One Battle (try to last the longest against three ninjas using pugil sticks). Ninja referees will oversee the bouts, with all rounds (except the last) being best out of five. In the end, there can be only one…Could it be you? Prize: Last ninja standing—GOTJ Gold Plaque, blinged out ninja suit, and a ninja escort to take you and a friend to all backstage areas from 6pm till midnight the following day. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins (32 competitors max—first come first serve, with those wearing ninja suits moving to the front of the line).
There are those with a seemingly lifelong obsession for getting tatted up. They view their body as a canvas on which an artist can break out the irons and start slinging ink. If this describes you, then it’s time to show off your masterpieces during this competition, whether you have a devotion tattoo, Hello Kitty tramp stamp, tribal sleeve, “exit only” anal tattoo, or full on body suit. Each competitor will have a chance to display their works to the crowd and judges who will score their tattoos based on size, originality, and artistic quality. Tat-a-tat-tat, that ink better be phat! Prizes: First Place—GOTJ Gold Plaque and $100 gift certificate; 2nd Place—$100 gift certificate; and 3rd Place—$50 gift certificate.Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins.
Texas Hold'Em Bounty Tournament
This is a game that will test the mental fortitude of its players. It is equal parts deception, wit, endurance, luck, intimidation, and perception. The best are those who play the player and not the cards, because in the end it’s predominately a game of skill as well. For this grueling elimination-style competition, players try to earn all the chips to win, while also looking to take out the celebrity bounty player to earn the special bounty prize! Prizes: First Place—GOTJ Gold Plaque and a custom made case of 300 Hatchetman poker chips; Second Place—$100 gift certificate; Third Place—$50 gift certificate; Bounty Prize—Silver Hatchetman Charm. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the tournament begins (80 players max) and must know how to play the game and deal.
The Neden Game
Got Neden? This ridiculous and slightly perverse game show returns once again to the Gathering and it aims to please (like a butt-plug wielding Brony). Here contestants are randomly drawn from the crowd to try to win a date with a tempting Juggalette or a suave Juggalo ninja (two rounds total). All you have to do is answer a series of bizarre questions from your romantic conquest who will remain hidden behind a screen until the very end when they will choose their date. The winner of each round will then get the privilege of hanging out backstage with their new found lady friend or suitor from 8 p.m. till midnight! What happens after that relies entirely on Cupid’s ability to penetrate (or not) with his performance-enhanced lubricated arrow.
Wet T-Shirt Competition
The recipe for raunchy fun just doesn’t get any better than this! Ingredients: 20 succulent Juggalettes, 20 white t-shirts, 50 gallons of Faygo, 12 buckets, 6 super soakers, 4 large kiddie pools, 1 dope MC, 1 live DJ, and 1 large crowd of excited Juggalos. Directions: 1. Glaze plump melons with white t-shirts. 2. Place Juggalettes in large kiddie pools. 3. Using super soakers and buckets, baste them in 1-2 gallons of Faygo each. 4. Have them stretch, grind, and bounce to the music. 5. Bring the crowd to a moderate steady boil as they beat themselves, occasionally until creamy. Prizes: First Place—$300 in cash; Second Place—$100 gift certificate; and Third Place—$50 gift certificate. Those wishing to compete should show up at least 15 minutes before the contest begins with a white T-shirt if possible. A private dressing room will be provided.